A gambling ships, aka gambling barges, are not to be confused with cruise liners that have casinos on board. A cruise liner, like the Royal Carribean Navigator of the Seas that is the theme of our current videos and articles, conduct their business as an all encompassing cruising experience. The casino is only onboard as a means to entertain the guests and generate supplemental revenue.
With the exception of a few guests who opt for the cruise as a gambling destination because of a casino promo, most people do not go cruising for the casino experience. The casino is kind of ancillary to the experience and the audience is captured, meaning if you want to gamble while doing the stuff that cruisers do, you have no choice but to play their tight slots and table games with crappy rules.
A gambling ship is entirely different. Unlike the cruise liner experience, everybody who boards a gambling ship is there solely for the gambling experience. Gambling is the primary experience, and the customers are not captured because they can decide to go to a land based casino. The gambling ship is forced to compete for consumer’s gambling dollars. For that reason, gambling ships can be better gambling deals than some land based casinos.
About a year ago, I went on a gambling ship out of Port Canaveral, Florida. I was there on business, and at the end of the day, my associate and his friends took me to a gambling ship called the Victory. Entry fee was $13 per person, which a dealer said can be waived with enough points on the player’s card.
My understanding is that the ships does two runs, one at 11 a.m. and returns at 6 p.m., and one later in the evening which leaves at 7 p.m.
We went on the evening cruise.
The cruise lasted about 6 hours, but of the six hours, about 30 to 40 minutes was spent going to and from international waters. In total, we had about 4 and a half hours of gambling.
The craps was quite good. I was expecting something like $10 with 2x odds, but it was $5 with 5x max odds.
All the table games were $5, so it was cheap gambling.
Incredibly, blackjack paid 3-2.
Our group had five people, and three of the five played slots. They reported that they did ok and thought the slots were looser than the slots on the strip in Vegas.
The dealers were very friendly.
This ship was huge. If I recall correctly, there were four levels to the casino.
Best part? Drinks were free.
If you want to stretch your gambling dollars, they have bingo.
I’ve only been on one gambling ship (the permanently docked gambling ships like the ones in Shreveport don’t count), but I give the experience a thumbs up and recommend you try it. Just expect the time to fly by.
I’ll Warn You Again: Do Not Call the Girls on Those Porn Slapper Cards
I had a buddy call me up at 3 a.m., a few weeks ago, in a panic because he called a girl on one of the porn slapper cards. Quote my friend, ‘no f*cking way this is the [girl] on the card’.
He didn’t use the word ‘girl’.
I’m not going to body shame anyone, but I’m sure you get it.
In my head, I’m doing the palm to the forehead and I can hear another guy in the background. My friend says that the guy is telling my buddy that he needs to pay.
According to my buddy, when the girl arrived, he (my friend) opened the door, and the girl invited herself inside with a hug and a wiggle. She asked him for the fee, but my buddy had a change of heart. He said told her to leave because he felt that they lied.
The girl refused to leave and ‘out of nowhere this guy comes in’ to the room and tries to get my buddy to pay a cancellation fee of $200. They’ve been in his room for 5 minutes saying they won’t leave until he pays $200. That’s when he called me.
There’s so much to unpack here…
$200 cancellation is a bullshit fee that’s made up. If she was able to extract the $100 fee from my buddy the moment she walked in the door, she would have kept the $100 and left with her consolation prize the moment my buddy changed his mind. The vast majority of the time, this is the likely outcome if the guy changes his mind.
The duo were just mad because they didn’t get anything out of my friend, yet.
Secondly, there’s no contract for services rendered, so he doesn’t owe anything to these people.
Anyways, I tell him to just call the front desk, do it on speaker phone so the duo can hear, and have security come up and kick them out.
My friend says he doesn’t want to call security. He has ‘party favors’ in the room.
I tell him, ‘look, security guards aren’t cops, stop being stupid and just call the front desk and tell them there are two people in your room who refuse to leave. Do it on speaker phone so they can hear you.’
He calls security and the duo leave when front desk says that security is on the way.
The trickier issue is what to do if you’re staying at a hotel without security guards.
It’s usually the case that these ‘entertainers’ will try soft intimidation. Violence is a sure way to put a major crimp in their business, so they usually won’t go that far [note: this sentence was specifically about Las Vegas; I’m not so sure about Chicago or Detroit]. They’re just looking to make advantage of gullible tourists. Having said that, if you really feel like you are being threatened with violence, leave the room right away, if possible, and call 911.
The problem with leaving the room right away is that the driver will usually stand in the doorway, making it look like he’s blocking the exit. Again, he’s usually bluffing. If you have anything out in the open, just expect it to be gone when you come back.
My advice is that if you don’t think violence is likely, then call 311. When you talk to 311, it’ll sound like you’re talking to 911, but it won’t tie up crucial services. Most guys who do call the porn slapper or ‘girls to your room’ ads are afraid that if they call the police, they’ll also end up going for a ride downtown for trying to hire a prostitute. The driver and the girl knows the fear, so they’ll play out the ‘you owe us’ charade for as long as they can.
Again, mostly it’s a bluff because their business is based on volume, and it’s not worth going to jail because they battered a tourist over $100. There are too many suckers in Vegas for them to risk their livelihood on one tourist who is being stubborn. It’s a game based on high volume.
I’ll repeat myself: if you think violence is possible, just forget the 311 schtick and call 911.
Best thing is to just not call the girls on the card, but guys sometimes do stupid things when they’re in Las Vegas, so a little bit of info goes a long ways.
Speaking of Questionable Acts in Vegas…What About Proposals?
About six weeks ago, I went to Vegas to support a good friend who was going to propose to his soon-to-be fiancée. Despite a little technical difficulty, she said ‘yes’.
You can my initial write up below.
Anyways, this was sometime near the end of July. Last week, I was at the movies with my friend and asked him if he and his fiancée had set a wedding date. His surprising answer was, ‘oh, we broke up and she gave me the ring back and I got a refund on the ring.’
I was a little surprised by the break up, but then again, people get engaged and break up all the time.
I was more surprised by the reaction of some of our mutual friends, which can be summed up as, ‘you get engaged in Vegas; what do you expect is gonna happen?’
Another female friend said, ‘who gets engaged in Vegas? He wasn’t taking it serious.’
Some of these friends were the same friends who were at the proposal doing the ‘awwwww, omg, she said yes!’
Do you guys and gals agree with those sentiments? I don’t know what to make of it. I don’t see anything wrong with a Vegas proposal.
Here was my write up the on the proposal, after it happened…
This post reminds me of the Reddit thread where people ask, ‘Am I The Asshole?’
I was just passing through Vegas because a friend asked me to witness his proposal to his fiancée. We were a group of 8, not including the couple.
I crashed on the sofa in my friend‘s room at Linq. Really nice rooms, btw.
It’s now approximately 4:30, and at 5 pm, we were all going to walk over to the Bellagio for my friend to do the proposal in front of the fountains. Someone in the group planned it so he would do the proposal right in front of the fountain. Then we had dinner reservations somewhere fancy. I don’t know where. I wasn’t the planner.
I meet the main group over at Harrah’s. Three of us and the soon to be fiancé (M) are at one end of the craps table. The FIL, who is in on the proposal, is there and he’s playing, too. I walk up to them and ask, ‘are we going?‘
‘We’re waiting for (so and so), they’re on the way’.
Hearing that, I squeeze in between them, pull out a pair of left over green Linq chips and say ‘$24 six and eight.’
7 out right away. Dam it.
Group is still not complete, but they’ll be here any moment now.
I pull out a $100 bill and say ‘$48 each, six and 8’. Remember, I’m expecting to leave any moment. No use in doing a real buy-in.
The new shooter on the opposite end then goes on a tear. On about the shooter’s 20th roll, the entire group is there, including the fiancée (F) who is going to be proposed to. She doesn’t know. Supposedly, it’s a surprise.
The roll starts to slow. Shooter is still hot. Around roll 30, someone in the group of 8 + 2 says, on the DL, ‘we’re going to be late’. FIL, who has black chips on the layout says, ‘it’s almost done‘.
Only 4 out of the group are playing. The rest, including the fiancée are just standing behind. Luckily, the FIL is playing, or else fiancé would have been compelled to leave, which means we would have been compelled to leave, too.
Around roll 40, the people in our group behind are really antsy.
It’s hot as balls in LV, so the four of us say, we gotta wait for it to cool down because it’s too hot outside. I think it got to 107. It was that hot.
Really, the four of us don’t want to leave because we are in the middle of the roll of the year, literally.
Around roll 45, the game has slowed to a crawl because the bets are now piled up, as you would expect from a hot run. The MIL, who I think made the reservations, says on the DL to the FIL ‘we‘re late’ and gives him the eye as to say, let’s get the f*ck out so they can do this proposal.
We are now very very late. FIL says, ’it’s almost over, this guy can’t roll much longer.’
Game slows to a bigger crawl because Repeater bets keep getting paid out and hardways and prop bets are hitting. At one point, FIL and fiancée each hit a $300 hard 6.
About 20 minutes later at roll 55, the guy finally rolls a 7 out.
The pic below is from my lone $100 cash buy in. I also had 12 black chips in my hand, including the chips being colored up.
The four of us are all high fiving each other on the walk to the fountains.
Proposal went well. We totally missed the post proposal reservations, and the photog was pissed and had to be paid extra, but we improvised and did other stuff and ate somewhere else.
So…are we the asshole for making everyone late and screwing up this girl’s once in a lifetime proposal?
Is the fiancé and FIL the asshole? Hey, the rest of us were just tagging along.
YTA = You’re the Asshole (meaning the 4 of us are assholes). Who’s the asshole?
NTA = Not The Asshole because who the hell leaves a hot table like that?